Part 12 out of 12
Printed by S. Gosnell,
Little Queen Street, Holborn.
For Sherwood, Neely and Jones,
Paternoster Row. 1813.
(Price Three Shillings.)
Successive Revises had run as follows:--
i. London: Printed for John Murray, Albemarle Street, Piccadilly. By S.
Gosnell, Little Queen Street. 1813.
ii. Cambridge: Printed by G. Maitland. For John Murray, etc.
iii. Cambridge: Printed by G. Maitland. For Sherwood, Neely and Jones,
Paternoster Row. 1813.
For the Bibliography of _The Waltz_, see vol. vi. of the present issue.
TO THE PUBLISHER.
I am a country Gentleman of a midland county. I might have been a
Parliament-man for a certain borough; having had the offer of as many
votes as General T. at the general election in 1812.  But I was all
for domestic happiness; as, fifteen years ago, on a visit to London, I
married a middle-aged Maid of Honour. We lived happily at Hornem Hall
till last Season, when my wife and I were invited by the Countess of
Waltzaway (a distant relation of my Spouse) to pass the winter in town.
Thinking no harm, and our Girls being come to a marriageable (or, as
they call it, 'marketable') age, and having besides a Chancery suit
inveterately entailed upon the family estate, we came up in our old
chariot,--of which, by the bye, my wife grew so ashamed in less than a
week, that I was obliged to buy a second-hand barouche, of which I might
mount the box, Mrs. H. says, if I could drive, but never see the
inside--that place being reserved for the Honourable Augustus Tiptoe,
her partner-general and Opera-knight. Hearing great praises of Mrs. H.'s
dancing (she was famous for birthnight minuets in the latter end of the
last century), I unbooted, and went to a ball at the Countess's,
expecting to see a country dance, or, at most, Cotillons, reels, and all
the old paces to the newest tunes, But, judge of my surprise, on
arriving, to see poor dear Mrs. Hornem with her arms half round the
loins of a huge hussar-looking gentleman I never set eyes on before; and
his, to say truth, rather more than half round her waist, turning round,
and round, to a d----d see-saw up-and-down sort of tune, that reminded
me of the "Black Joke," only more "'affettuoso'" till it made me
quite giddy with wondering they were not so. By and by they stopped a
bit, and I thought they would sit or fall down:--but no; with Mrs. H.'s
hand on his shoulder, "'Quam familiariter'" (as Terence said, when I
was at school,) they walked about a minute, and then at it again, like
two cock-chafers spitted on the same bodkin. I asked what all this
meant, when, with a loud laugh, a child no older than our Wilhelmina (a
name I never heard but in the 'Vicar of Wakefield', though her mother
would call her after the Princess of Swappenbach,) said, "L--d! Mr.
Hornem, can't you see they're valtzing?" or waltzing (I forget which);
and then up she got, and her mother and sister, and away they went, and
round-abouted it till supper-time. Now that I know what it is, I like it
of all things, and so does Mrs. H. (though I have broken my shins, and
four times overturned Mrs. Hornem's maid, in practising the preliminary
steps in a morning). Indeed, so much do I like it, that having a turn
for rhyme, tastily displayed in some election ballads, and songs in
honour of all the victories (but till lately I have had little practice
in that way), I sat down, and with the aid of William Fitzgerald, Esq.,
and a few hints from Dr. Busby, (whose recitations I attend, and am
monstrous fond of Master Busby's manner of delivering his father's late
successful "Drury Lane Address,") I composed the following hymn,
wherewithal to make my sentiments known to the Public; whom,
nevertheless, I heartily despise, as well as the critics.
I am, Sir, yours, etc., etc.
[Footnote 1: State of the poll (last day) 5.
[General Tarleton (1754-1833) contested Liverpool in October, 1812. For
three days the poll stood at five, and on the last day, eleven. Canning
and Gascoigne were the successful candidates.]]
[Footnote 2: More expressive.--[_MS_.]
[Footnote 3: My Latin is all forgotten, if a man can be said to have
forgotten what he never remembered; but I bought my title-page motto of
a Catholic priest for a three-shilling bank token, after much haggling
for the even sixpence. I grudged the money to a papist, being all for
the memory of Perceval and "No popery," and quite regretting the
downfall of the pope, because we can't burn him any more.--[Revise No.
[Footnote 4: See 'Rejected Addresses'.]
Muse of the many-twinkling feet!  whose charms
Are now extended up from legs to arms;
Terpsichore!--too long misdeemed a maid--
Reproachful term--bestowed but to upbraid--
Henceforth in all the bronze of brightness shine, [i]
The least a Vestal of the Virgin Nine.
Far be from thee and thine the name of Prude:
Mocked yet triumphant; sneered at, unsubdued;
Thy legs must move to conquer as they fly,
If but thy coats are reasonably high! 10
Thy breast--if bare enough--requires no shield;
Dance forth--_sans armour_ thou shalt take the field
And own--impregnable to _most_ assaults,
Thy not too lawfully begotten "Waltz."
Hail, nimble Nymph! to whom the young hussar, 
The whiskered votary of Waltz and War,
His night devotes, despite of spur and boots;
A sight unmatched since Orpheus and his brutes:
Hail, spirit-stirring Waltz!--beneath whose banners
A modern hero fought for modish manners; 20
On Hounslow's heath to rival Wellesley's  fame,
Cocked, fired, and missed his man--but gained his aim;
Hail, moving muse! to whom the fair one's breast
Gives all it can, and bids us take the rest.
Oh! for the flow of Busby,  or of Fitz,
The latter's loyalty, the former's wits,
To "energise the object I pursue,"
And give both Belial and his Dance their due! [ii]
Imperial Waltz! imported from the Rhine
(Famed for the growth of pedigrees and wine), 30
Long be thine import from all duty free,
And Hock itself be less esteemed than thee;
In some few qualities alike--for Hock
Improves our cellar--_thou_ our living stock.
The head to Hock belongs--thy subtler art
Intoxicates alone the heedless heart:
Through the full veins thy gentler poison swims,
And wakes to Wantonness the willing limbs.
Oh, Germany! how much to thee we owe,
As heaven-born Pitt can testify below, 40
Ere cursed Confederation made thee France's,
And only left us thy d--d debts and dances! 
Of subsidies and Hanover bereft,
We bless thee still--George the Third is left!
Of kings the best--and last, not least in worth,
For graciously begetting George the Fourth.
To Germany, and Highnesses serene,
Who owe us millions--don't we owe the Queen?
To Germany, what owe we not besides?
So oft bestowing Brunswickers and brides; 50
Who paid for vulgar, with her royal blood,
Drawn from the stem of each Teutonic stud:
Who sent us--so be pardoned all her faults--
A dozen dukes, some kings, a Queen--and Waltz.
But peace to her--her Emperor and Diet,
Though now transferred to Buonaparte's "fiat!"
Back to my theme--O muse of Motion! say,
How first to Albion found thy Waltz her way?
Borne on the breath of Hyperborean gales,
From Hamburg's port (while Hamburg yet had _mails_), 60
Ere yet unlucky Fame--compelled to creep
To snowy Gottenburg-was chilled to sleep;
Or, starting from her slumbers, deigned arise,
Heligoland! to stock thy mart with lies; [iii]
While unburnt Moscow  yet had news to send,
Nor owed her fiery Exit to a friend,
She came--Waltz came--and with her certain sets
Of true despatches, and as true Gazettes;
Then flamed of Austerlitz the blest despatch, 
Which _Moniteur_ nor _Morning Post_ can match 70
And--almost crushed beneath the glorious news--
Ten plays, and forty tales of Kotzebue's; 
One envoy's letters, six composer's airs,
And loads from Frankfort and from Leipsic fairs:
Meiners' four volumes upon Womankind, 
Like Lapland witches to ensure a wind;
Brunck's heaviest tome for ballast,  and, to back it,
Of Heyne,  such as should not sink the packet. [iv]
Fraught with this cargo--and her fairest freight,
Delightful Waltz, on tiptoe for a Mate, 80
The welcome vessel reached the genial strand,
And round her flocked the daughters of the land.
Not decent David, when, before the ark,
His grand _Pas-seul_ excited some remark;
Not love-lorn Quixote, when his Sancho thought
The knight's _Fandango_ friskier than it ought;
Not soft Herodias, when, with winning tread,
Her nimble feet danced off another's head;
Not Cleopatra on her Galley's Deck,
Displayed so much of _leg_ or more of _neck_, 90
Than Thou, ambrosial Waltz, when first the Moon
Beheld thee twirling to a Saxon tune!
To You, ye husbands of ten years! whose brows
Ache with the annual tributes of a spouse;
To you of nine years less, who only bear
The budding sprouts of those that you _shall_ wear,
With added ornaments around them rolled
Of native brass, or law-awarded gold;
To You, ye Matrons, ever on the watch
To mar a son's, or make a daughter's match; 100
To You, ye children of--whom chance accords--
_Always_ the Ladies, and _sometimes_ their Lords;
To You, ye single gentlemen, who seek
Torments for life, or pleasures for a week;
As Love or Hymen your endeavours guide,
To gain your own, or snatch another's bride;--
To one and all the lovely Stranger came,
And every Ball-room echoes with her name.
Endearing Waltz!--to thy more melting tune
Bow Irish Jig, and ancient Rigadoon.  110
Scotch reels, avaunt! and Country-dance forego
Your future claims to each fantastic toe!
Waltz--Waltz alone--both legs and arms demands,
Liberal of feet, and lavish of her hands;
Hands which may freely range in public sight
Where ne'er before--but--pray "put out the light."
Methinks the glare of yonder chandelier
Shines much too far--or I am much too near;
And true, though strange--Waltz whispers this remark,
"My slippery steps are safest in the dark!" 120
But here the Muse with due decorum halts,
And lends her longest petticoat to "Waltz."
Observant Travellers of every time!
Ye Quartos published upon every clime!
0 say, shall dull _Romaika's_ heavy round,
_Fandango's_ wriggle, or _Bolero's_ bound;
Can Egypt's _Almas_ --tantalising group--
Columbia's caperers to the warlike Whoop--
Can aught from cold Kamschatka to Cape Horn
With Waltz compare, or after Waltz be born? 130
Ah, no! from Morier's pages down to Galt's, 
Each tourist pens a paragraph for "Waltz."
Shades of those Belles whose reign began of yore,
With George the Third's--and ended long before!--
Though in your daughters' daughters yet you thrive, [v]
Burst from your lead, and be yourselves alive!
Back to the Ball-room speed your spectred host,
Fool's Paradise is dull to that you lost. [vi]
No treacherous powder bids Conjecture quake;
No stiff-starched stays make meddling fingers ache; [vii] 140
(Transferred to those ambiguous things that ape
Goats in their visage,  women in their shape;)
No damsel faints when rather closely pressed,
But more caressing seems when most caressed;
Superfluous Hartshorn, and reviving Salts,
Both banished by the sovereign cordial "Waltz."
Seductive Waltz!--though on thy native shore
Even Werter's self proclaimed thee half a whore;
Werter--to decent vice though much inclined,
Yet warm, not wanton; dazzled, but not blind-- 150
Though gentle Genlis,  in her strife with Stael,
Would even proscribe thee from a Paris ball;
The fashion hails--from Countesses to Queens,
And maids and valets waltz behind the scenes;
Wide and more wide thy witching circle spreads,
And turns--if nothing else--at least our _heads_;
With thee even clumsy cits attempt to bounce,
And cockney's practise what they can't pronounce.
Gods! how the glorious theme my strain exalts,
And Rhyme finds partner Rhyme in praise of "Waltz!" 160
Blest was the time Waltz chose for her _debut_!
The Court, the Regent, like herself were new; 
New face for friends, for foes some new rewards;
New ornaments for black-and royal Guards; [viii]
New laws to hang the rogues that roared for bread;
New coins (most new)  to follow those that fled;
New victories--nor can we prize them less,
Though Jenky  wonders at his own success;
New wars, because the old succeed so well,
That most survivors envy those who fell; 170
New mistresses--no, old--and yet 'tis true,
Though they be _old_, the _thing_ is something new;
Each new, quite new--(except some ancient tricks), 
New white-sticks--gold-sticks--broom-sticks--_all new sticks_!
With vests or ribands--decked alike in hue,
New troopers strut, new turncoats blush in blue:
So saith the Muse: my----,  what say you?
Such was the time when Waltz might best maintain
Her new preferments in this novel reign;
Such was the time, nor ever yet was such; 180
Hoops are _ more_, and petticoats _not much_;
Morals and Minuets, Virtue and her stays,
And tell-tale powder--all have had their days.
The Ball begins--the honours of the house
First duly done by daughter or by spouse,
Some Potentate--or royal or serene--
With Kent's gay grace, or sapient Gloster's mien, [ix]
Leads forth the ready dame, whose rising flush
Might once have been mistaken for a blush.
From where the garb just leaves the bosom free, 190
That spot where hearts  were once supposed to be;
Round all the confines of the yielded waist,
The strangest hand may wander undisplaced:
The lady's in return may grasp as much
As princely paunches offer to her touch.
Pleased round the chalky floor how well they trip
One hand reposing on the royal hip! 
The other to the shoulder no less royal
Ascending with affection truly loyal!
Thus front to front the partners move or stand, 200
The foot may rest, but none withdraw the hand;
And all in turn may follow in their rank,
The Earl of--Asterisk--and Lady--Blank;
Sir--Such-a-one--with those of fashion's host, [x] 
For whose blest surnames--vide "Morning Post."
(Or if for that impartial print too late,
Search Doctors' Commons six months from my date)--
Thus all and each, in movement swift or slow,
The genial contact gently undergo;
Till some might marvel, with the modest Turk, 210
If "nothing follows all this palming work?" 
True, honest Mirza!--you may trust my rhyme--
Something does follow at a fitter time;
The breast thus publicly resigned to man,
In private may resist him--if it can.
O ye who loved our Grandmothers of yore,
Fitzpatrick,  Sheridan, and many more!
And thou, my Prince! whose sovereign taste and will [xi]
It is to love the lovely beldames still!
Thou Ghost of Queensberry!  whose judging Sprite 220
Satan may spare to peep a single night,
Pronounce--if ever in your days of bliss
Asmodeus struck so bright a stroke as this;
To teach the young ideas how to rise,
Flush in the cheek, and languish in the eyes;
Rush to the heart, and lighten through the frame,
With half-told wish, and ill-dissembled flame,
For prurient Nature still will storm the breast--
_Who_, tempted thus, can answer for the rest?
But ye--who never felt a single thought 230
For what our Morals are to be, or ought;
Who wisely wish the charms you view to reap,
Say--would you make those beauties quite so cheap?
Hot from the hands promiscuously applied,
Round the slight waist, or down the glowing side,
Where were the rapture then to clasp the form
From this lewd grasp and lawless contact warm? [xii]
At once Love's most endearing thought resign,
To press the hand so pressed by none but thine;
To gaze upon that eye which never met 240
Another's ardent look without regret;
Approach the lip which all, without restraint,
Come near enough--if not to touch--to taint;
If such thou lovest--love her then no more,
Or give--like her--caresses to a score;
Her Mind with these is gone, and with it go
The little left behind it to bestow.
Voluptuous Waltz! and dare I thus blaspheme?
Thy bard forgot thy praises were his theme.
Terpsichore forgive!--at every Ball 250
My wife _now_ waltzes--and my daughters _shall_;
_My_ son--(or stop--'tis needless to inquire--
These little accidents should ne'er transpire;
Some ages hence our genealogic tree [xiii]
Will wear as green a bough for him as me)--
Waltzing shall rear, to make our name amends
Grandsons for me--in heirs to all his friends.
[Footnote 1: "Glance their many-twinkling feet."--GRAY.]
[Footnote 2: Lines 15-28 do not appear in the MS., but ten lines
(omitting lines 21-24) were inserted in Proof No. 1.]
[Footnote 3: To rival Lord Wellesley's, or his nephew's, as the reader
pleases:--the one gained a pretty woman, whom he deserved, by fighting
for; and the other has been fighting in the Peninsula many a long day,
"by Shrewsbury clock," without gaining anything in 'that' country but
the title of "the Great Lord," and "the Lord;" which savours of
profanation, having been hitherto applied only to that Being to whom
"'Te Deums'" for carnage are the rankest blasphemy.--It is to be
presumed the general will one day return to his Sabine farm: there
"To tame the genius of the stubborn plain,
'Almost as quickly' as he conquer'd Spain!"
The Lord Peterborough conquered continents in a summer; we do more--we
contrive both to conquer and lose them in a shorter season. If the
"great Lord's" 'Cincinnatian' progress in agriculture be no speedier
than the proportional average of time in Pope's couplet, it will,
according to the farmer's proverb, be "ploughing with dogs."
By the bye--one of this illustrious person's new titles is forgotten--it
is, however, worth remembering--"'Salvador del mundo!" credite,
posteri'! If this be the appellation annexed by the inhabitants of the
Peninsula to the name of a 'man' who has not yet saved them--query--are
they worth saving, even in this world? for, according to the mildest
modifications of any Christian creed, those three words make the odds
much against them in the next--"Saviour of the world," quotha!--it were
to be wished that he, or any one else, could save a corner of it--his
country. Yet this stupid misnomer, although it shows the near connection
between superstition and impiety, so far has its use, that it proves
there can be little to dread from those Catholics (inquisitorial
Catholics too) who can confer such an appellation on a 'Protestant'. I
suppose next year he will be entitled the "Virgin Mary;" if so, Lord
George Gordon himself would have nothing to object to such liberal
bastards of our Lady of Babylon.
[William Pole-Wellesley (1785?-1857), afterwards fourth Lord Mornington,
a nephew of the great Duke of Wellington, married, in March, 1812,
Catharine, daughter and heiress of Sir Tylney Long, Bart. On his
marriage he added his wife's double surname to his own, and, thereby,
gave the wits their chance. In 'Rejected Addresses' Fitzgerald is made
"Bless every man possess'd of aught to give,
Long may Long-Tilney-Wellesley-Long-Pole live."
The principals in the duel to which Byron alludes were Wellesley-Pole
and Lord Kilworth. The occasion of the quarrel was a misconception of
some expression of Pole's at an assembly at Lady Hawarden's (August 6,
1811). A meeting took place on Wimbledon Common (August 9), at which the
seconds intervened, and everything was "amicably adjusted." Some days
later a letter appeared in the 'Morning Post' (August 14, 1811), signed
"Kilworth," to the effect that an apology had been offered and accepted.
This led to a second meeting on Hounslow Heath (August 15), when shots
were exchanged. Again the seconds intervened, and, after more
explanations, matters were finally arranged. A 'jeu d'esprit' which
appeared in the 'Morning Chronicle' (August 16, 1811) connects the
"mortal fracas" with Pole's prowess in waltzing at a fete at Wanstead
House, near Hackney, where, when the heiress had been wooed and won, his
guests used to dine at midnight after the opera.
"Mid the tumult of waltzing and wild Irish reels,
A prime dancer, I'm sure to get at her--
And by Love's graceful movements to trip up her heels,
Is the Long and the short of the matter."]
[Footnote 4: Thomas Busby, Mus. Doc. (1755-1838), musical composer, and
author of 'A New and Complete Musical Dictionary', 1801, etc. He was
also a versifier. As early as 1785 he published 'The Age of Genius, A
Satire'; and, after he had ceased to compose music for the stage,
brought out a translation of Lucretius, which had long been in MS. His
"rejected address" on the reopening of Drury Lane Theatre, would have
been recited by his son (October 15), but the gallery refused to hear it
out. On the next night (October 16) "Master" Busby was more successful.
Byron's parody of Busby's address, which began with the line, "When
energising objects men pursue," is headed, "Parenthetical Address. By
[Footnote 5: The Confederation of the Rhine (1803-1813), by which the
courts of Wuertemberg and Bavaria, together with some lesser
principalities, detached themselves from the Germanic Body, and accepted
the immediate protection of France.]
[Footnote 6: The patriotic arson of our amiable allies cannot be
sufficiently commended--nor subscribed for. Amongst other details
omitted in the various [A] despatches of our eloquent ambassador, he did
not state (being too much occupied with the exploits of Colonel C----,
in swimming rivers frozen, and galloping over roads impassable,) that
one entire province perished by famine in the most melancholy manner, as
follows:--In General Rostopchin's consummate conflagration, the
consumption of tallow and train oil was so great, that the market was
inadequate to the demand: and thus one hundred and thirty-three thousand
persons were starved to death, by being reduced to wholesome diet! the
lamp-lighters of London have since subscribed a pint (of oil) a piece,
and the tallow-chandlers have unanimously voted a quantity of best
moulds (four to the pound), to the relief of the surviving
Scythians;--the scarcity will soon, by such exertions, and a proper
attention to the 'quality' rather than the quantity of provision, be
totally alleviated. It is said, in return, that the untouched Ukraine
has subscribed sixty thousand beeves for a day's meal to our suffering
[Hamburg fell to Napoleon's forces in 1810, and thence-forward the mails
from the north of Europe were despatched from Anholt, or Gothenberg, or
Heligoland. In 1811 an attempt to enforce the conscription resulted in
the emigration of numbers of young men of suitable age for military
service. The unfortunate city was deprived of mails and males at the
same time. Heligoland, which was taken by the British in 1807, and
turned into a depot for the importation of smuggled goods to French
territory, afforded a meeting-place for British and continental traders.
Mails from Heligoland detailed rumours of what was taking place at the
centres of war; but the newspapers occasionally threw doubts on the
information obtained from this source. Lord Cathcart's despatch, dated
November 23, appeared in the 'Gazette' December 16, 1812. The paragraph
which appealed to Byron's sense of humour is as follows: "The expedition
of Colonel Chernichef ('sic') [the Czar's aide-de-camp] was a continued
and extraordinary exertion, he having marched seven hundred wersts
('sic') in five days, and swam several rivers."]
[Sub-Footnote A: Veracious despatches.--['MS. M'.] ]
[Footnote 7: Austerlitz was fought on Dec. 2, 1805. On Dec. 20 the
'Morning Chronicle' published a communication from a correspondent,
giving the substance of Napoleon's "Proclamation to the Army," issued on
the evening after the battle, which had reached Bourrienne, the French
minister at Hamburg. "An army," ran the proclamation, "of 100,000 men,
which was commanded by the Emperors of Russia and Austria, has been in
less than four hours either cut off or dispersed." It was an official
note of this "blest despatch," forwarded by courier to Bath, which
brought "the heavy news" to Pitt, and, it is believed, hastened his
[Footnote 8: August Frederick Ferdinand von Kotzebue (1761-1819), whom
Coleridge appraised as "the German Beaumont and Fletcher without their
poetic powers," and Carlyle as "a bundle of dyed rags," wrote over a
hundred plays, publishing twenty within a few years.
An adaptation of 'Misanthropy and Repentance' as 'The Stranger',
Sheridan's 'Pizarro', and Lewis' 'Castle Spectre' are well-known
instances of his powerful influence on English dramatists.
"The Present," writes Sara Coleridge, in a note to one of her father's
letters, "will ever have her special votaries in the world of letters,
who collect into their focus, by a kind of burning-glass, the feelings
of the day. Amongst such Kotzebue holds a high rank. Those 'dyed rags'
of his once formed gorgeous banners, and flaunted in the eyes of
refined companies from London to Madrid, from Paris to
Coleridge's 'Biographia Literaria' (1847), ii. 227.]
[Footnote 9: A translation of Christopher Meiner's 'History of the
Female Sex', in four volumes, was published in London in 1808. Lapland
wizards, not witches, were said to raise storms by knotting pieces of
string, which they exposed to the wind.]
[Footnote 10: Richard Franz Philippe Brunck (1729-1803). His editions of
the 'Anthologia Graeca', and of the Greek dramatists are among his best
known works. Compare Sheridan's doggerel--
"Huge leaves of that great commentator, old Brunck,
Perhaps is the paper that lined my poor 'Trunk'."]
[Footnote 11: Christian Gottlob Heyne (1729-1812) published editions of
'Virgil' (1767-1775), 'Pindar' (1773), and 'Opuscula Academica', in six
[Footnote 12: A lively dance for one couple, characterized by a peculiar
jumping step. It probably originated in Provence.]
[Footnote 13: Dancing girls--who do for hire what Waltz doth gratis.
[The Romaika is a modern Greek dance, characterized by serpentining
figures and handkerchief-throwing among the dancers. The Fandango
(Spaniards use the word "seguidilla") was of Moorish origin. The Bolero
was brought from Provence, circ. 1780.
"The Bolero intoxicates, the Fandango
('Hist. of Dancing', by G. Vuillier-Heinemann, 1898).]]
[Footnote 14: For Morier, see note to line 211. Galt has a paragraph
descriptive of the waltzing Dervishes ('Voyages and Travels' (1812),
[Footnote 15: It cannot be complained now, as in the Lady Baussiere's
time, of the "Sieur de la Croix," that there be "no whiskers;" but how
far these are indications of valour in the field, or elsewhere, may
still be questionable. Much may be, and hath been;[A] avouched on both
sides. In the olden time philosophers had whiskers, and soldiers
none--Scipio himself was shaven--Hannibal thought his one eye handsome
enough without a beard; but Adrian, the emperor, wore a beard (having
warts on his chin, which neither the Empress Sabina nor even the
courtiers could abide)--Turenne had whiskers, Marlborough
none--Buonaparte is unwhiskered, the Regent whiskered; "'argal'"
greatness of mind and whiskers may or may not go together; but certainly
the different occurrences, since the growth of the last mentioned, go
further in behalf of whiskers than the anathema of Anselm did
'against' long hair in the reign of Henry I.--Formerly, 'red'
was a favourite colour. See Lodowick Barrey's comedy of 'Ram
Alley', 1661; Act I. Scene I.
'Taffeta'. Now for a wager--What coloured beard comes next by the
'Adriana'. A black man's, I think.
'Taffeta'. I think not so: I think a 'red', for that is most in
There is "nothing new under the sun:" but 'red', then a 'favourite', has
now subsided into a favourite's colour. [This is, doubtless, an allusion
to Lord Yarmouth, whose fiery whiskers gained him the nickname of "Red
[Sub-Footnote A: The paragraph "Much may be" down to "reign of Henry
I." was added in Revise 1, and the remainder of the note in Revise 2.]]
[Footnote 16: Madame Genlis (Stephanie Felicite Ducrest, Marquise de
Sillery), commenting on the waltz, writes,
"As a foreigner, I shall not take the liberty to censure this kind of
dance; but this I can say, that it appears intolerable to German
writers of superior merits who are not accused of severity of
and by way of example instances M. Jacobi, who affirms that "Werther
('Sorrows of Werther', Letter ix.), the lover of Charlotte, swears that,
were he to perish for it, never should a girl for whom he entertained
any affection, and on whom he had honourable views, dance the waltz with
any other man besides himself."--'Selections from the Works of Madame de
Genlis' (1806), p. 65.
Compare, too, "Faulkland" on country-dances in 'The Rivals', act ii. sc.
"Country-dances! jigs and reels! ... A minuet I could have forgiven
... Zounds! had she made one in a cotillon--I believe I could have
forgiven even that--but to be monkey-led for a night! to run the
gauntlet through a string of amorous palming puppies ... Oh, Jack,
there never can be but one man in the world whom a truly modest and
delicate woman ought to pair with in a country-dance; and even then,
the rest of the couples should be her great-uncles and aunts!"]
[Footnote 17: An anachronism--Waltz and the battle of Austerlitz are
before said to have opened the ball together; the bard means (if he
means anything), Waltz was not so much in vogue till the Regent attained
the acme of his popularity. Waltz, the comet, whiskers, and the new
government, illuminated heaven and earth, in all their glory, much about
the same time: of these the comet only has disappeared; the other three
continue to astonish us still.--'Printers Devil'.
[As the 'Printer's Devil' intimates, the various novelties of the age of
"Waltz" are somewhat loosely enumerated. The Comet, which signalized
1811, the year of the restricted Regency, had disappeared before the
Prince and his satellites burst into full blaze in 1812. It was (see
'Historical Record of the Life Guards', 1835, p.177) in 1812 that the
Prince Regent commanded the following alterations to be made in the
equipments of the regiment of Life Guards: "Cocked hats with feathers to
be discontinued, and brass helmets with black horsehair crests
substituted. Long coats, trimmed with gold lace across the front. Shirts
and cuffs to be replaced by short coatees," etc., etc. In the same
branch of the service, whiskers were already in vogue. The "new laws"
were those embodied in the "Frame-work Bill," which Byron denounced in
his speech in the House of Lords, Feb. 27, 1812. Formerly the breaking
of frames had been treated "as a minor felony, punishable by
transportation for fourteen years," and the object of the bill was to
make such offences capital. The bill passed into law on March 5, and as
a result we read ('Annual Register', 1812, pp. 38, 39) that on May 24 a
special commission for the rioters of Cheshire was opened by Judge
Dallas at Chester. "His lordship passed the awful sentence of death upon
sixteen, and in a most impressioned address, held out not the smallest
hope of mercy." Of these five 'only' were hanged.
Owing to the scarcity of silver coinage, the Bank of England was
empowered to issue bank-tokens for various sums (Mr. Hornem bought his
motto for 'The Waltz' with a three-shilling bank-token; see 'note' to
Preface) which came into circulation on July 9, 1811. The "new
ninepences" which were said to be forthcoming never passed into
circulation at all. A single "pattern" coin (on the obverse, 'Bank
Token, Ninepence, 1812') is preserved in the British Museum (see
privately printed 'Catalogue', by W. Boyne (1866), p.11). The "new
victories" were the fall of Ciudad Rodrigo (Jan. 17), the capture of
Badajoz (April 7), and the Battle of Salamanca (July 12, 1812). By way
of "new wars," the President of the United States declared war with
Great Britain on June 18, and Great Britain with the United States, Oct.
13, 1812. As to "new mistresses," for a reference to "'Our' Sultan's"
"she-promotions" of "those only plump and sage, Who've reached the
regulation age," see 'Intercepted Letters, or the Twopenny Post-bag', by
Thomas Brown the Younger, 1813, and for "gold sticks," etc., see
"Promotions" in the 'Annual Register' for March, 1812, in which a long
list of Household appointments is duly recorded.]]
[Footnote 18: Amongst others a new ninepence--a creditable coin now
forthcoming, worth a pound, in paper, at the fairest calculation.]
[Footnote 19: Robert Banks Jenkinson, second Earl of Liverpool, was
Secretary at War and for the Colonies from 1809 to 1812, in Spencer
Perceval's administration, and, on the assassination of the premier,
undertook the government. Both as Secretary at War and as Prime Minister
his chief efforts were devoted to the support of Wellington in the
[Footnote 20: "Oh that 'right' should thus overcome 'might!'" Who does
not remember the "delicate investigation" in the 'Merry Wives of
'Ford'. Pray you, come near; if I suspect without cause, why then make
sport at me; then let me be your jest; I deserve it. How now? whither
bear you this?
'Mrs. Ford'. What have you to do whither they bear it?--You were best
meddle with buck-washing."
[Act iii. sc. 3.]
[Footnote 21: The gentle, or ferocious, reader may fill up the blank as
he pleases--there are several dissyllabic names at 'his' service (being
already in the Regent's): it would not be fair to back any peculiar
initial against the alphabet, as every month will add to the list now
entered for the sweep-stakes;--a distinguished consonant is said to be
the favourite, much against the wishes of the 'knowing ones'.--['Revise']
[In the Revise the line, which is not in the MS., ran, "So saith the
Muse; my M----what say you?" The name intended to be supplied is
On Perceval's death (May 11 1812), Lord Liverpool became Prime Minister,
but was unable to carry on the government. Accordingly the Prince Regent
desired the Marquis Wellesley and Canning to approach Lords Grey and
Grenville with regard to the formation of a coalition ministry. They
were unsuccessful, and as a next step Lord Moira (Francis Rawdon, first
Marquis of Hastings, 1754-1826) was empowered to make overtures in the
same quarter. The Whig Lords stipulated that the regulation of the
Household should rest with ministers, and to this Moira would not
consent, possibly because the Prince's favourite, Lord Yarmouth, was
Vice-Chamberlain. Negotiations were again broken off, and on June 9
Liverpool began his long term of office as Prime Minister.
"I sate," writes Byron, "in the debate or rather discussion in the
House of Lords on that question (the second negotiation) immediately
behind Moira, who, while Grey was speaking, turned round to me
repeatedly, and asked me whether I agreed with him. It was an awkward
question to me, who had not heard both sides. Moira kept repeating to
me, 'It is 'not' so; it is so and so,'" etc.
(Letter to W. Bankes (undated), 'Life', p. 162). Hence the question, "My
Moira, what say you?"]
"We have changed all that," says the Mock Doctor--'tis all
gone--Asmodeus knows where. After all, it is of no great importance
how women's hearts are disposed of; they have nature's privilege to
distribute them as absurdly as possible. But there are also some men
with hearts so thoroughly bad, as to remind us of those phenomena
often mentioned in natural history; viz. a mass of solid stone--only
to be opened by force--and when divided, you discover a _toad_ in the
centre, lively, and with the reputation of being venomous."
[In the MS. the last sentence stood: "In this country there is _one man_
with a heart so thoroughly bad that it reminds us of those unaccountable
petrifactions often mentioned in natural history," etc. The couplet--
"Such things we know are neither rich nor rare,
But wonder how the Devil they got there,"
which was affixed to the note, was subsequently erased.]]
[Footnote 23: Compare Sheridan's lines on waltzing, which Moore
heard him "repeat in a drawing-room"--
"With tranquil step, and timid downcast glance,
Behold the well-pair'd couple now advance.
In such sweet posture our first parents moved,
While, hand in hand, through Eden's bower they roved.
Ere yet the devil, with promise fine and false,
Turned their poor heads, and taught them how to waltz.
One hand grasps hers, the other holds her hip.
For so the law's laid down by Baron Trip."]
[Footnote 24: Lines 204-207 are not in the MS., but were added in a
[Footnote 25: In Turkey a pertinent--here an impertinent and superfluous
question--literally put, as in the text, by a Persian to Morier, on
seeing a Waltz in Pera. [See 'A Journey through Persia', etc. By James
Morier, London (1812), p. 365.]
[Footnote 26: Richard Fitzpatrick (1747-1813), second son of John, first
Earl of Ossory, served in the first American War at the battles of
Brandywine and Germanstown. He sat as M.P. for Tavistock for
thirty-three years. The chosen friend and companion of Fox, he was a
prominent member of the opposition during the close of the eighteenth
century. In the ministry of "All the Talents" he was Secretary at War.
He dabbled in literature, was one of the authors of the 'Rolliad', and
in 1775 published 'Dorinda: A Town Eclogue'. He was noted for his social
gifts, and in recognition, it is said, of his "fine manners and polite
address," inherited a handsome annuity from the Duke of Queensberry.
Byron associates him with Sheridan as 'un homme galant' and leader of
'ton' of the past generation.]
[Footnote 27: William Douglas, third Earl of March and fourth Duke of
Queensberry (1724-1810), otherwise "old Q.," was conspicuous as a
"blood" and evil liver from youth to extreme old age. He was a patron of
the turf, a connoisseur of Italian Opera, and 'surtout' an inveterate
libertine. As a Whig, he held office in the Household during North's
Coalition Ministry, but throughout George the Third's first illness in
1788, displayed such indecent partisanship with the Prince of Wales,
that, when the king recovered, he lost his post. His dukedom died with
him, and his immense fortune was divided between the heirs to his other
titles and his friends. Lord Yarmouth, whose wife, Maria Fagniani, he
believed to be his natural daughter, was one of the principal legatees.]
'Henceforth with due unblushing brightness shine'.
['MS. M'.] ]
'And weave a couplet worthy them and you.'
'To make Heligoland the mart for lies'.
'As much of Heyne as should not sink the packet'.
'Who in your daughters' daughters yet survive
Like Banquo's spirit be yourselves alive.'
'Elysium's ill exchanged for that you lost'.
'No stiff-starched stays make meddling lovers ache'.
'New caps and Jackets for the royal Guards'.
'With K--t's gay grace, or silly-Billy's mien'.
'With K--t's gay grace, or G--r's booby mien'.
'Sir--Such a one--with Mrs.--Miss So-so'.
'And thou my Prince whose undisputed will'.
'From this abominable contact warm'.
'Some generations hence our Pedigree
Will never look the worse for him or me.'
END OF VOL. I.
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